The day that seemed would never come is here at last.
Seems odd, but for the last few months I've scarcely paid any thought to this coming adventure. The habit is something I only adopted within the last year - learning to live in the moment, not dwelling on the future when it seems so uncertain. Perhaps I'm making up for twenty-two years of so many imagined futures that I’m overcompensating by living so completely in the "here and now" of this one.
Maybe being engrossed in the present has been a defense mechanism for dealing with what I know is on the horizon (not thinking about it because that way I feel more intrepid in the face of change).
Whatever the case, the "here and now" is giving way to something entirely new. I'm off on an adventure so far from what I know; doing a job unlike anything I ever imagined doing... I wonder if I'm even feeling the way others feel at this stage, or if it's the way to feel...
I'll spare everyone anymore of my histrionic self-evaluations. Just thought I should write out what I'm thinking so later I'll know how I felt when I first set out.
The next time I write, I'll be in CHINA!
